When Pizzerias Don’t Pan Out

All Justin and I wanted the night we watched “The Dark Knight Rises” and “Contagion” (common themes: bats and Stockholm-syndrome-afflicted Marion Cotillard) was to kick back with a nice cheesy, pepperoni-encrusted pizza. This is Hong Kong, we thought, how hard can it be?

Forty minutes of internet trawling and calling individual pizzerias will get you the same answer: Nobody fucking delivers after 11pm. Nobody. Except Ebeneezer’s and Pizza Express, which have the good grace to stop at 11.30pm (the latter does this on weekends). How generous.

See, I forgave the city for not having easily accessible wood glue, an Ace Hardware or a strange lack of squid at supermarkets.  But not having a 24-hour pizza delivery service? That should be a crime, along with exorbitant rents.

Someone needs to explain this to me. McDonald’s has a 24-hour delivery service, which means it’s not tied to some strict local labor laws. (Besides, you hear these horror stories of nightmare Cantonese bosses asking their office workers to stay overnight. Work is simply not ignored here.) It can’t be the lack of manpower.

So I decided to send out an inquiry to some of the key pizza providers in Hong Kong, so they can explain why they don’t provide 24-hour delivery. Surely some canny pizzeria owner had thought he would have a captive market of past-midnight porn aficionados and night owls who can’t muster the energy to physically line up at the local 24-hour Paisano’s for a 70-dollar slice.

Here’s why there’s no 24-hour pizza delivery in Hong Kong:

Pizza Hut 
Pizza Huts all over the world follow that McDonaldization thing where they tweak their food to suit local tastes, but that can be dangerous. In Jakarta, I once had this weird Mac N’ Cheese with cream in it, and pizzas with weird stuff like pork floss and broccoli on top. In HK, the pies are alright, as long as you don’t order anything with Thousand Island sauce and don’t venture into the lasagna.

We do not provide 24-hours delivery service because of operational reason and market demand. We appreciate for your comment and support to us. Thank you for your kind attention.”
Tara Liu, Customer Service Department
Paisano’s

Never got back to me.

Ebeneezer’s

Never got back to me.

Pizzeria Italia

Never got back to me.

Pizza-BOX

Never got back to me.

PizzaExpress
Points for the prompt response! And from high-level management. Their pizzas — in that three-floor flatiron — are actually great. Shame about delivery.

“I am sorry that we do not offer 24 hour delivery – we simply do not get enough orders after midnight to justify the expense of staying open all night.”
Justin Kennedy, Managing Director

So stay awake and order a pizza, Hong Kong workaholics and party animals!! Otherwise, we’ll all just be binging on McNuggets at 6am!

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